I hate vocation stories…or at least I used to. I always struggle with the fact that so many of these stories, after dealing with the twists and turns of that person’s vocational journey, seemed to end with seminary as if it were the solution to all their problems. But I have to tell you that that is not the case, as I learned the hard way.

As I entered seminary, I believed that it would be like my past experiences of college, but when I tried to joke and be myself, it was badly received, so I pulled back and was quiet. I was told that my theology degree would help me get out of introductory classes, but I found myself fighting tooth and nail to prove that I knew anything. And an irrational fear of the human pillar of seminary formation—of being told I wasn’t human enough—was quickly realized in my first formation meeting. I felt like Jeremiah in the First Reading, who said, “You duped me, O LORD, and I let myself be duped.”

In a similar way, in the Gospel we heard last week, Peter has just heard that Jesus would “give [him] the keys to the kingdom of heaven.” But then in today’s Gospel, Jesus turns around and predicts His Passion, which seems to go completely counter to what Jesus had just said to him about the Kingdom of God. So it’s no wonder that he says, “God forbid, Lord! No such thing shall ever happen to you.”

As I continued through seminary, I continued to feel this heaviness, and whenever it became too overwhelming, I would find myself saying to myself: “I don’t want to be here.” The last time I preached, I talked about listening for God’s voice in the silence. But when we listen for God’s voice, there is the risk also of hearing our own or the enemy’s voice. When I brought the situation to my spiritual director, he very simply and bluntly said, “And whose voice do you think that is?”

When I was able to recognize that that voice was not from God, this did not remove the sufferings, but allowed me to see this as part of God’s Plan. Instead of being a passive participant in my life, I felt God calling me to take an active role in my spiritual life. Jesus tells us, “Whoever wishes to come after me must deny himself, take up his cross, and follow me.”

We are also called to take an active role in our spiritual lives, taking up the crosses that God allows to come into our lives. However, as we carry our crosses, we do not do this alone, but always following after Jesus. I don’t hate vocation stories anymore because I know that it’s only part of the story, that discerning our vocation is part of the Cross, but a Cross that ultimately leads to the Resurrection.

Father Frank

One of my favorite memories from my childhood was Saturday afternoons. After a busy morning of chores, we would spend the afternoon watching cooking shows. One of my favorites was Julia Child, and one of the episodes can teach us a spiritual lesson.  In the episode, while she was flipping a potato pancake, she flipped it a little too enthusiastically, so that it fell off the pan onto the stove. She then picked up the pancake, put it back in the pan, and looking directly at the camera, said, “Well, if you’re all alone in the kitchen, nobody will know.”

As we come to the end of August, many parents have already taken their kids to college, school is starting up, and a new year of ministry is beginning here at Our Lady of Mercy. As we do this, there is often a drive for perfection. Maybe we have high expectations for the year, or we have goals to make it even better than last year. But all too often, the year doesn’t turn out how we planned. And because of this, it can be tempting to give up.

The same can be true of our spiritual lives. Maybe we plan to pray every day, but get to the end of a busy day realizing that we forgot to do it. Or maybe we feel that every time we go to Confession, we confess the same sins. So what are we supposed to do? St. Benedict has a short but profound phrase that can serve as our motto: “Always we begin again.”

Sometimes we become so discouraged by the fact that we have messed up that we don’t want to try again. But the Bible tells us: “For a righteous man falls seven times, and rises again” (Proverbs 24:16). We can’t just let the potato pancake sit on the stove, but we need to pick it up again.

The ability to get up again does not come from a “pick yourself up by your bootstraps” kind of attitude, but rather an attitude of humility. Our desire to wallow in our mistake comes from a pride that says, “How could I have done this?” But in humility, we are called to come to Jesus—not just when we feel good about ourselves—but when we are at our lowest, we need to admit our mistake and allow Him to lift us up once again.

It is precisely in that moment of allowing Jesus to lift us up again that we begin to grow in holiness. It is then that we realize how much we need Jesus and learn to rely on Him. We need to remember St. Benedict’s phrase, “Always we begin again,” so that we don’t remain in our mistake, but, with Jesus’ help, start fresh, whether that means returning to the Sacrament of Confession, or picking a potato pancake up off the stove and putting it back in the pan.

Father Frank

Sometimes we come across a Gospel reading where we initially hear it and don’t know how to react!  This Sunday’s reading of Jesus initially rejecting the Canaanite woman is perhaps one of them. We may see Jesus’s treatment and response to her harsh and difficult to comprehend. Isn’t our faith in Jesus Christ based on his willingness to die for EVERYONE? Why does Jesus ignore this woman and then compare the Canaanite people to dogs? 

I’m sure there are various ways to approach this Gospel passage. One approach is to ask the question, “Could Jesus be testing the woman’s perseverance even in the midst of persecution, which is something the Apostles will eventually have to learn themselves?” I, however, would like to approach today’s Gospel with this main proposition about our own brokenness:  When God’s actions don’t match up with our will, we seem to always perceive God’s actions as harsh and questionable. 

Have you ever wanted God to act or respond to a problem in your life? And what happened when your prayers were not answered in the ways you wanted them to?  Did you throw a fit? (As I have done many times) Did you feel like God didn’t have a plan for you, let alone love you? 

Yet, what is clear throughout the Scriptures is that God loves all of us and desires to bring salvation, not only to the Israelites, but to all people (cf. 1 Tim 2:4). We fail in our perception of God’s plan in not understanding that God doesn’t always act the way we want Him to. We don’t see God’s greater picture of salvation. Jesus Christ came to fulfill the covenants (promises) given to the Israelites first, and then spread salvation to the whole world.  Hence Christ said, “I was sent only to the lost sheep of the house of Israel” (Matthew 15:24). And then after his death and resurrection he said, “Go, therefore and make disciples of ALL NATIONS, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit” (Matthew 28:16-20).  God’s plan from the very beginning was to bring all nations, including the Canaanite woman, into His Body the Church. Yet, in its proper time and way! 

Sometimes when God doesn’t act or respond the way we want Him too, we feel that God is harsh and unresponsive.  But what we need to realize is that the Lord’s love and plan is greater than our own.  He desires the good and salvation of all people, including you and me!  Let’s, yes, learn from the Canaanite woman in perseverance, but more importantly trust in the Lord when He doesn’t respond in the way we want Him too!  

Father Michael

In my junior year of college, I took part in a silent retreat for the first time. This retreat came at the perfect time in my life. For years, I had been thinking about priesthood, but as I got older, I pushed it to the back of my mind. So by the time I got to this retreat, I felt like I had no idea what direction to go.

The priest directing the retreat told us that the reason we were dedicating this time to silence was so that we could hear God’s voice. On the last day of the retreat, during a Holy Hour where I told God, “Lord, I’ve given you these two whole days of silence. Please tell me what my vocation is. I am open to anything.” Within a minute, I felt a voice say, “What about diocesan priesthood?”

In the First Reading, Elijah waits in a cave for God to pass by. There are many loud and flashy events that he could have mistaken for God, but it is only in the still, small voice that he recognizes God. For most of us, taking a silent retreat is not an option. But we can take moments of silence throughout our day to listen for the voice of God. Then, we will be better able to hear His voice and recognize where He is working in our lives. But this is just the beginning.

After I felt the voice on the retreat, I was so angry that I stormed out of the chapel (even though I had helped plan the retreat). And in the months that followed, I tried to pretend I hadn’t heard that voice.

In the Gospel, Peter also recognizes God passing by, and he asks Jesus to call him to walk on the water. But when he takes his eyes off Jesus because he is distracted by the wind, he begins to sink. So what do we do after we recognize the voice of God?

I came to a point where I realized that I was almost trying to live a double life, feeling in my heart that God was calling me to priesthood while trying to plot my own path. But when I followed my own path, I began to sink. It was only then that I began to rely on God, saying with Peter, “Lord, save me!”

We also need to allow the voice of God we hear in prayer to affect our lives. We all need to ask God: “How are You calling me to follow You?” Next week, we will have a ministry fair where we will have the opportunity to have a taste of the many wonderful ministries our parish offers and discern how God is calling us to serve Him. When we take time to recognize the still, small voice of God in the silence, then we are better able to follow Him even if it means following Him out onto the water.

Father Frank

“I got you!”… I know that it’s probably not the most grammatically correct saying out there. It might be better to say, “I have your back.” Nonetheless, these are the words that come to my mind as I reflect on the Transfiguration of Jesus in today’s Gospel: “I got you!” 

  The Transfiguration is the point where Jesus reveals to Peter, James, and John his divine nature, but also his kingly status. This harkens back to the first reading from the Prophet Daniel: “The one like a Son of man received dominion, glory, and kingship; all peoples, nations, and languages serve him. His dominion is an everlasting dominion that shall not be taken away, his kingship shall not be destroyed” (Daniel 7:13-14). A king, especially in the Old Testament, was made king because he would protect his people.  As we also heard proclaimed in the psalm, “the Lord is King”! The Lord is going to do everything in his power to protect us. 

Peter, James, and John see Jesus “transfigured before them; his face shone like the sun and his clothes became white as light” (Mt. 17:2). Later, “a bright cloud cast a shadow over them, then from the cloud came a voice that said, ‘This is my beloved Son, with whom I am well pleased; listen to him’” (Mt. 17:5). With this glimpse of his divine and kingly nature, the disciples are given strength to endure not only the crucifixion, but also are given strength for their future ministries. The Lord is King and has already won the battle. 

  As we celebrate the Transfiguration, know that Jesus desires for us to have the same personal encounter with him that his apostles experienced in the Gospel. That way, whatever crosses may come, we will know in a profound way that Jesus Christ is King and is willing to fight and die for us!  

After the Transfiguration, Jesus walks down the mountain with Peter, James, and John and tells them to “not tell the vision to anyone until the Son of Man has been raised from the dead” (Mt.17:9). Ultimately, the Transfiguration reveals the Lord’s divine plan and his desire for us to join him in the coming resurrection as well. When things get difficult, I just keep hearing Jesus Christ saying in response, “I got you!” 

Father Michael